If time would stop for us
by hyndara71
Summary: Missing scene to 5.19 Vegas. Was Sheppard really forgotten in the desert? Warning for CD


**Author's note:** The first of all I would thanks a lot to ktebid who looked over the fic and helped me so much. This story is a translation of my Fanfic _"Und stünde still die Zeit für uns ..."_ and my first try to write something in English. I hope you enjoy. And yes, for me was the Rodney in _Vegas_ the Rod from _McKay And Mrs. Miller_.  
**Dedication:** Like the original fic so I want to dedicate this translation to Jane Sheppard . I have written this one for her to give her strengh in the fight against illness. She lost this fight, but she will be never forgotten! JS, once you saved my life, now I want to build something that lasts for you. You were such a great friend and the lost of you is one more pain in my broken heart.  
**Disclaimer:** Stargate: Atlantis is not mine, was not mine und unfortunatly will never be mine.

* * *

Rodneys head was empty for a moment. There was a bitter taste on his tongue and a really bad feeling inside his belly while Woolseys last words echoed in this emptiness between his ears:

„Forgive me but other dimensions are not on my list of priorities right now."

Full of desperation Rodney stared at the screen his fingernails duc deeply into Radek's chair.

And he remembered another man on another day in another dimension. A man other than that one he met hours before. Not this half-broken failed man who had perhaps sacrified himself to save earth. No, Rodney remembered a totally different man. The man he met before and he now remembered the morning they two spent together. Rodney saw him with a boyish smile and a sparkle in the eyes as he swang a golf-club. A soft and salty Lantean breeze caressed his wild hair and his wiry body showed every muscle he used for the hit.

Rodney had lied to him that day, in that time. He had lied to all of the beloved folks of Atlantis. But he didn't know any other way. It felt so right to be with them, so damned right!

The rogue look in the dark eyes which changed into one of anger. A face which betrayed the mischievous John Sheppard and made him appear even younger.

What would have happened if … ? What would have happened if he and this half-broken John Sheppard had met before? Years before?

„There is something!" Radek whispered. He bowed down, nearer to the screen and pushed his glasses back on his nose.

John Sheppard, the bitter police detective. The man who stood alone and didn't wish anyone within his reach. The man who carried his broken heart and had not the ability to begin another relationship, even years after the incident in Afghanistan.

Rodney had lied to him too, he lied more to him because he knew more about he had noticed the pain in Sheppards eyes. Too much pain, too much resignation. And so much distrust and a silent warning not to cross that line, not to take the last step.

Rodney yearned for something, a relationship like the other Rodney McKay and the other John Sheppard shared. He yearned for such a great friendship, yearned for similiar trust. Simply the friend he never found because destiny didn't give either of them, but especially the pilot John Sheppard, a chance to do.

There was something. Just tiny. A single little sign other (human) technics had not found. Something the explosion had overlaped.

„A life-sign!"

Rodney stood up promptly and looked over his shoulder. „He is still alive." He said to Woolsey.

But the FBI-agent was inbound on a call. He looked up for a second and then he turned around to show Rodney his back.

„Sheppard is still alive, Mr. Woolsey", Rodney repeated.

„But not for much longer. Life-sign's getting weaker", Radek told them both and looked up to Rodney. „Whatever we o we should do it fast."

But Woolsey seemed not interested in this particular information. He spoke in the damned telephone and ignored them both.

Rodneys hands became fists.

He felt so angry and helpless and couldn't do anything. He was out of the loop here on earth. He returned from Atlantis to help catch the wraith, hoping it was just the one. He was ordered here to stop the signal and that was at least the important thing all about, inclusive the perhaps-sacrifice of a shady police detective. But this man was a price he was not prepared to pay.

„He is still alive, Agent Woolsey! He might be wounded. We have to act quickly!"

Woolseys call continued.

And this, right now, was enough!

Once he had returned from the other tempting dimension he had given up a perhaps a better life, he relinquished that extraordinary friendship. He sacrified it all for the survival of his home dimension. But he wouldn't do it again.

Woolseys call went on.

„Woolsey!"

His fist collided with the metallic table. Cups danced and paper rustled. His hand hurt but it was a good pain.

He was sure if they could rescue Sheppard he had a chance to blow up this rock and heal his weak and wounded heart to find the friendship he had missed without ever knowing he was a part of.

Rodney could not count how often he pretended to talk to a friend he never had while he layed in his bed at night. The desire became pain after he met the other Rodney and the other John in the other dimension.

And right now he wasn't prepared to sacrifice this possible friendship. He would not disown John Sheppard. Not now, not ever!

When he had noticed the established detective's name it felt like a door opened to his destiny. A door he lost the key to long before, never knowing what he was missing. A door that leads him to a better life.

This was because he wanted to talk with Sheppard and got him involved to the secrets of the Stargate. He gambled with their both of their destinies and hoped that this Sheppard had a part of the Colonel Sheppard he met in the other dimension.

And he was sure he broke through the hard nutshell. Not much but enough for Sheppard to risk his life. And therefore he and Sheppard were now in need of help. But for this help they needed Woolsey.

„Agent Woolsey, you've heard me? Detective Sheppard is still alive!".

And now there was a reaction from the FBI-agent. Woolsey moved on slowly and finished the telephone call.

„This is something we don't know exactly", he said, „Dr. McKay, the US government is thankful for what Detective Sheppard may have done. Is this life-sign his? We don't know for sure. And as long as we don't know no one will drive outsite into the wasteland."

„Signal's getting weaker. Whoever it is out there he is dying." Radek said.

Woolsey's eyes were hard but the muscles in his face began to work. „We cannot do that. I'm sorry."

„Sheppard is trustful enough to get rescued. You are wrong, Agent Woolsey. He is a person we could trust. He's showed it to us." Rodney explained. „And now he is in need of help. Who we are to ignore this?"

Woolsey studied the screen. „If I was wrong, and I'm not." He corrected. „You know what that last telephone callwas? With the Police Commissioner. Sheppard gave back his police-badge and wanted to leave Vegas. Should I tell you more? Evidence was lost after Sheppard left. To be correct it was never listed. Only a witness knew about it. A bag, probably full of money. I'm pretty sure it was the same I saw when I met him to come with me. He suppressed evidence, that was what he did."

„Wow, and because of this suspicion you will leave him to die?" Radek pulled a face. „I'm sorry to say but you know how many politicians are corrupt? Do you want to leave them to die in the desert too?"

„Rumors." Woolsey said.

„You will send a rescue team outside right now, nclusiding a special squad. Time's running out!"

Rodney felt a little doubt in his bely. John Sheppard corrupt? No, that he could not believe! Sheppard was a bitter man who felt disillusioned with his own life. But on the other hand … Rodney couldn't know the financial problems of the detective. No one could imagine what was going on in John Sheppard's mind.

„He made a call before he left", Woolsey explained and took his hat. „He called a number in Reno. It wouldn't makes me wonder if he was on the way to met the receiver. I'm on the way to have a look over there."

In the next second Rodney blocked Woolseys way.

„You will order a rescue team right now", he threatened. „We need to know what the hell is going on out there!"

Woolsey stared into his eyes and then bowed his head a little bit to put the hat on. „One less security problem", he told Rodney with a hard glint in his eyes. „Now I must take care and ensure the program is kept secret.."

„NO!" Rodney spat out and wished it hadn't been only this word. „You will order a rescue team for Sheppard, Agent Woolsey! He is dying!"

„If it is him who's dying", the FBI-agent corrected. „I'm sorry, Dr. McKay."

„The help he offered to us does not count?" Radek asked. „Does that really go along with your conscience, Agent?"

Woolseys lips thinned. For one moment it seemed like his eyes were on an angry fire but then … he moved around and gave the order to the military police officer at the door. „The doctors McKay and Zelenka are in need of a helicopter and special troops. You will fix that promptly!" Then he left and Rodney sighed, his heart lightening.

They had a chance. Maybe they could rescue Sheppard, and maybe he could break down the barriers once more. Maybe he could help John Sheppard back to life, to a life like the other John Sheppard owned in that other dimension. Maybe they would become friends …

Of course he'd had good years, he had friends and a new relationship with Jennifer Keller. But this special friendship, this mental affinity he noticed at the other McKay and Sheppard, he missed in his own life.

Maybe life gave only one chance for such a special relationship, and there was only one person to share it with. It was possible he would never have known about it, if he'd never jumped over into that other dimension … So many ifs and whens.

Woolseys suspicion about being corrupt counted a lot. Rodney felt it in his belly. It hurt and gave him a bitter taste of bile in his mouth.

Was he wrong? Would nothing help this John Sheppard to cross the bridge back to an useful life? Was Woolsey right? Was he, Rodney, blinded only by the possibility of a relationship between himself and John Sheppard?

The helicopter started and lifted up. The ado from the rotors was so loud it seemed they were trying to blow all thoughts out of Rodneys head, he was lucky to be wearing a headset.

Jennifer Keller did not join the little group. There was another doctor, a man, sitting on the seat opposite Rodney, a specialist perhaps.

If there was the possibility of another decision about the Afghanistan incident would that mean there was another John Sheppard? If his rescue attempt had been successful did that mean he was never judged? He hat never left the air force? Rodney could not understand at all why there was no one who controlled Sheppards DNS. When the Afghanistan incident happened the SGC was in need of every gene they could find because of the Atlantis' expedition. So, why wasn't Sheppard tested like his double in the other dimension?

Ifs and whens and possibilities …

Rodney took a look at the screen Radek carried with them to locate the signal.

What hadn't he noticed? When did he get it wrong? Who was the call-receiver in Reno?

Rodney had a suspicion.

There are some things that happened in nearly every dimension, some people how met all over the universes. And he remembered right now one person …

Despair bit in Rodneys neck and tried to shake him like an angry dog his toy.

Sheppard had to survive, he had to!

„Over there you can see the position", the pilot said and Rodney looked up to the outside.

There was a giant trail of smoke not far away. The winds from the desert blow it up high in the sky, but down on the ground there were the remnants of a fire – and a single red car not far away. A car like Sheppard had driven …

Rodneys heart stood still for a moment.

Sheppard had to survive, he had to!

„The signal is getting faint. We have to hurry!" Radek said.

The wraith was so near to them, Rodney noticed. So damned near, right under their eyes and they had not noticed it. What a joke!

But now they had to rescue the hero who saved earth! And Sheppard had to fight for his very life while they had to get to him.

There was a pain in Rodneys heart at the thought of Sheppard's death.

And he swore: If Sheppard did not make it, if they had to bury his cold body, he, Rodney McKay, would do everything not to forget this hero. He would do his best for the friend he never had and would do it with the respect John Sheppard deserved. This special hero would never be forgotten. If John Sheppard was dead there was simply nothing to replace this extraordinary man.

Ground zero was a wasteland in the wasteland. The silver bullet was bombed to pieces. Only Sheppards car seemed not as damaged. Okay, not damaged by the bombs but by the bullet-holes in the metal.

„Where is the signal?" Rodney asked.

Radek looked up. And his face was very serious.

No! Not now! Never! He would never accept it, never!

„Go down!" Rodney ordered to the pilot.

He would never accept Sheppard dying, alone and forgotten within the wasteland of Nevada. There had to be a chance! They had to!

When the helicopter started to touch the ground Rodney could take a look at the body.

Sheppard was lying on the ground, no movement, no sign of life. Nothing!

„You will not die", Rodney whispered.

Sheppard should do something. He should move but he did nothing!

The rotors whirled sand and dust up in the air and then the helicopter touched the ground.

Rodney was the first out of the cabin and he ran straight to the body on the ground, full of hopes and fears, ifs and whens. He believed so much and wished so hard for the friend he never had.

He was the first beside John Sheppard and looked down at him.

The detective smiled like he was luckier than he'd ever been before. His eyes stared at the blue sky and far, far away. So far away to the invisible stars in the sky. Maybe to another galaxy.

Rodney was the first besides the body, he was the true believer that something positive had to happen. And Rodney McKay was the last one who recognized the truth about John Sheppards smile …


End file.
